Am I an Influencer or Has the World Passed Me By?

Hi Everyone

Most of my readers will know that as you approach middle age, many things pass you by and, more importantly, many opportunities are lost. This week, however, I discovered a new source of income that could make me very wealthy, as an internet influencer. It could be that just by reading this Rubbish every week that your life has changed. Apparently, if you have between a thousand and ten thousand followers, you are a nano influencer. It then goes up to micro, macro, and finally mega if you have over one million followers. Now I have to be honest and say that I am nowhere near even the nano level yet, so I have invented a new level - microbic. To boost my following, leading to the luxury lifestyle that has so far eluded me, I need to offer my expert advice and experience to promote the sale of products that my followers are craving to buy. Based on my recommendations and sales patter, you will then boost the sales of my products, leading to my luxury lifestyle. I now have to decide what products to promote, with your support in sharing my information to the internet world, and of course, accepting my advice. You are now, as a loyal Rubbish reader, the first people to learn what products I intend to promote, bearing in mind the age of most of my readers.  Top of the list is the super fast stair lift, especially designed for those of you who only have an upstairs toilet. Then we have the diamond studded zimmer frame, the hearing aids with built in music channels so that you cannot hear what you are told to do by your doctor (assuming you can find one) and finally a solid gold pacemaker to ensure that you have something of value to take with you when you go. 

Have you ever wondered how people like the Senior Partner or my lovely mother in law would have coped with all the modern technology that we have to deal with today? In the case of the Senior Partner, there would be no problems at all, as she was far too tight with money to go beyond the large black telephone with the knotted cord that only cost her 36p in calls in three months. She turned the phrase “Don’t call us, we’ll call you” on its head. As for my lovely mother in law, she thought that she had to shout down the phone to someone as they were not in the same room but several miles away to make sure they heard her. The truth is that there are still lots of Senior Partners and lovely mother in laws approaching middle age who are confused by modern technology and need help that is rapidly disappearing. Join the club.

I never fail to be impressed by the world of volunteering. Within a five mile radius of our home, I could easily name ten volunteer groups with people of all ages involved. Nearly all of them are there to help people with various problems or just giving their time to give something back to less fortunate people than themselves. For many, it is the social interaction that attracts them to a group. All these groups seek finance to enable them to exist and progress. When you apply my five mile radius to the whole country, the numbers become astounding. There are, of course, many sources of financial help, but I am not sure that our politicians really appreciate the very important work that these groups are doing. 

Just a Thought:

What do pimples and social media influencers have in common? They both start small, grow huge, explode, then leave a nasty scar until one day we forget they were ever there.

Do you know how to make £1b in the Tech business? Start with £2b.

Brian